TO WARSH OR NOT TO WARSH? Ending the Great Chicken Washing War

It's WARSH for all you Heathens out there

So the Chicken Washing War has fully engulfed the universe, and I never even knew there was a question about this. My Mother washed each chicken as if it had the plague, and I just assumed this was the natural course of things. But evidently I was wrong, and the whole thread of society is becoming unravelled over this one topic. Never mind politics, or natural disasters, or whose Baby Daddy is in charge of the next Birthday Bash, THIS is the question for our times:

Do you wash your chicken before cooking?

Now, a properly washed chicken is not ‘washed’, it is WARSHED, because when pronounced properly, this denotes extra and vigorous scrubbing. Do not ‘@’ me, infidel, we all know this is correct. But I am somewhat more benevolent about the whole ‘wash chicken vs do not wash chicken’ debate, for we are living in a modern Apocalpyse, and the young peoples must be educated unless we all end up with death. There is a reason we pray over food - because, back in the days, it could kill us. But I needed a source…

and here it is.

My Mama's Better Homes and Gardens Cookbook 1953... my Holy Grail of Cooking WILL have the answer. Notice the Cake Batter from my 1st Birthday still clinging to the cover 💖😭

Gaze upon the beautiful Meat page... the glazed Ham still glistens, even from beyond the gates of Heaven, to be served with collard greens and homemade cornbread... but what about chicken?

The answer lies within, my mother's reason for everything - for even as her mother taught her, so the book would tell her in 1953:

SHE HAD TO PLUCK THE CHICKEN FIRST😲 THEN PROCESS IT

And so this gorgeous creature continued to wash the everliving fork out of each chicken, long after the days of plucking were gone, until her last delicious pan-fried chicken was cooked. She knew someone had to catch that chicken.

These Potato-Cam Chickens are Pet Chickens and will never be eaten💖

So the answer is:

Do what your Mama told you 💖 when it comes to cooking, that answer will always the best…

it is an answer born from love.